If Sherlock ever applied his science of elementary to Indian soap operas, he would have quit his profession and would have probably jumped to his death much before his scuffle with Moriarty (though that was not real either). Logic and Indian serials do not go hand in hand, most of the time. And the credit goes to the queen of soap operas, Ekta Kapoor. She “revolutionized” Indian Television, as some might like to put it, and though most of her serials initially had a good concept, they proceeded to defy all logic as the “story” went haywire. Let us take a look at some of the quintessential things that only happen in an Ekta Kapoor soap opera.
Multiple Weddings within the family
Itna Karo Na Mujhe Pyar
Complicated paperwork and court proceedings? Ha! What is that?
Plastic Surgery
Tulsi and her different avatars
Yes, I fell off a cliff. Yes, my face got burned. Yes, I got a new voice and a new body along with my new face. *Free* *Free* *Free*.
People don’t age
Ram Kapoor in Kasam Se
They just gain weight and change hair styles, with an unreal patch of white.
Immortal Dadis/Ba’s
Elixir of Life
One generation leap, Ba is around. Second generation leap, Ba is still around. Third generation leap. Oh my god! Ba is immortal!
Is he dead? Is he not? Is he? Is he not?
Enough!
Well, you never die in an Ekta Kapoor serial. You come back, after plastic surgery, with a new body and voice too. Or there is always divine intervention.
Every action has an equal and opposite reaction!
Shock, betrayal, grief.
Ekta Kapoor has diligently followed the law. Here, every action has more than equal reactions. Zoom in, zoom out. Zoom in again, zoom out again. Repeat for all the characters present in the room, till audience nauseous.
You can be bankrupt, but…
Image means everything
The designer sarees and jewellery would still be the same. And yes, they double up as sleepwear too!
The males of the family are present 24/7
Babuji
And the only work that they are shown doing is giving presentations, or meetings abroad. Rest of the time? Reading newspaper in sherwanis.
