We choose our friends but not our family – family is the hand we’re dealt and there is little we can do about it. We tend to feel this most strongly for our siblings. Brother(s) and sister(s) are the people we are likely to have fought most with. However, while that sibling may be one's most bitter foe; the same sibling could also be that one lifelong friend; the one person to depend upon no matter what.
Sibling revelry rivalry (usually a euphemism for bitter enmity) starts early in life. I know of instances of people who, as kids, tried unsuccessfully to bump off or at least do serious bodily harm to a sibling.
“You’re adopted,” is something that my brother told me; and which my kids tell each other. Just some vicious pleasantries that siblings are known to share.
Older siblings always think the younger one is stupid, over-smart, pampered, undeserving, always-wrong, just basically unbearable. Older kids also feel that the younger one gets away with anything.
Younger siblings always tend to think that the older sibling is unfair and overbearing. They feel that the older one has lots of advantages and gets all sorts of favours – just because he or she was born earlier.
That streak of sadism that all of us seem to have buried deep within us? It comes to the fore when it comes to siblings. Nothing gives us so much satisfaction as a sibling getting into trouble.
Front seat of the car, fave food, who gets to use something first… siblings can fight about anything… also everything.
Parents say stupid things: “now be nice”, “hug and make up”, “try and appreciate your brother/sister”, “no swearing”. Siblings find their own ways to convey their sentiments.
Sometimes, the parent(s) is the bigger enemy. It then becomes imperative to present a united front or a coalition of the siblings against the might of parental obduracy/idiocy.
There are times when siblings grudgingly have to ask each other for help and accept that help as grudgingly… because they know that the favour will be reclaimed at a later date – with interest.
You are the only person that gets to mess with your sibling. When there is an external aggression, they’ll have you to deal with!
Absence or perhaps maturity does make the heart grow fonder. I have seen a lot of siblings who are best friends as adults even though they fought like cats and dogs as kids. Clearly, I have to wait a long time before I see this happening with my kids.
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