For sure, it’s a tempest in a teacup – the young wife of an established Bollywood celebrity made some admittedly insensitive and reasonably ignorant remarks and everyone and his blogger cousin decided to react, castigate and chasten the new mother and homemaker. So what did Mira Rajput say and why is everyone in such a tizzy about it? Why are feminists up in arms against her? Does Shahid Kapoor’s wife deserve all the bad press she is getting?
It is the Indian way isn't it? Marry off our daughters young so that they produce healthy babies and blend into their husband’s families seamlessly while they are still malleable and haven’t yet had time to think for themselves or form their own opinions and life aspirations? Well, Mira Rajput is this very ideal: married off to a suitable man at 20, fresh out of college, a beautiful mother of a gorgeous child by 22.
Perfect!
Given her profile, what was her specific qualification for being invited to speak on the occasion of Women’s Day – the fact that she is a celebrity by association? That she is wise by virtue of this? Hmm… speaks more about our celebrity obsession than her personal qualification or lack thereof.
So she chose to be a homemaker, young mother, stay at home woman… good for her. Let’s respect her for that. Supporting women for all the choices that they make freely – without judgment – is what the women's movement is about!
Less than flattering comments made about career women and puppies and using ignorant terms such as ‘feminazi’ is not ideal but these stem from the woman’s admittedly limited world view and experience. The women’s movement is not so fragile that it will suffer a setback because of a few uninformed words.
One of the charges leveled against Mira Rajput is that of speaking from a privileged space; growing up in a prosperous family and married into another; never having the actual need to work for money. But this is also par for the course. Privilege is rarely acknowledged for what it is. Victimhood? Yes. Privilege? No.
Most recently a college batchmate of Mira Rajput anonymously spoke out against her for what she did in college. Firstly, if you have something to say, don’t hide behind anonymity. And chiding someone for that they did in college – when most of us were probably silly and misguided – just appears small minded. Even Mira Rajput doesn’t deserve this. Her main crime here is smugness; little else.
She is probably more aware and henceforth, is going to choose her words with a lot more circumspection. Meanwhile, let’s not judge each other for our personal choices even if we may disapprove of them. This undermines everything that women have worked so hard for, just so we can achieve a semblance of parity with our male counterparts. The work is far from done. Let’s support each other every way we can and not judge each other. Each woman has her own reality, her own limitations and set of compulsions. Let’s just all of us muddle through as best we can. Peace Out Girls!
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