Condoms are mostly advertised as birth control devices or a way to stop the spread of sexually transmitted diseases. For the first time, an Argentinian company has made it about consent. The condom or rather the packaging sends out a positive message about consent, a concept that a lot of men (and women) continue to have some very misguided notions about.
Tulipán Argentina has created a condom with packaging that needs two people to unpack. The box is such that it has to be held by one person and opened by the other – special points on the side of the packaging must be pressed simultaneously to gain access to the contents. This is meant to convey the concept of consent being clear and ongoing. If one of the two people does not say ‘No’, this cannot be taken to mean ‘Yes’.
The product packaging also underlines the importance of consent needing to be ongoing. If at any point after intimacy is initiated, one of the two people wishes to discontinue, they can do so; they can refuse to give their consent to full intercourse even if they have consented to much else before that.
The anti-rape message of this product is a positive one; considering the severe harm that rape can do. An estimated 94% of rape survivors could have some PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder) symptoms. As many as a third of rape survivors may actually contemplate suicide.
While the idea was widely appreciated, it also came in for criticism from a lot of people. Firstly, people pointed out that a lot of poeple (especially rapists), may not bother to use a condom at all; they may not be particularly bothered by the need to have safe sex. Rape is often a crime meant to assert power and dominance; in such cases, the perpetrator is unlikely to think about the protection or wellbeing of their victim. It was also pointed out that only about 14.5% Argentinian men, (the product has been launched in Argentina) regularly use a condom; as such the packaging of a product they don’t use wouldn’t impact them one way or the other.
Commentators also asked how a device like this would prevent rape. Who would buy it – a potential victim or a potential rapist? While a potential victim could conceivably buy something like this; it would be useless if their attacker decided to dispense with the use of a condom altogether. And it would be highly unlikely that a potential rapist would buy something like this – as a kind of deterrent on the off chance that they were overcome by the desire to indulge in sex without consent. The product marketers seem to be overestimating the humanity of a rapist, felt some commentators.
The foregoing are good arguments, and there are likely to be few, if any instances where this would serve to actually prevent rape. However, it is the message that the product sends out that is important: the yes should be unequivocal; not a mere absence of ‘no’. This can also be a way for couples to express respect for each other's wishes – sending out the message that they have the maturity and the simple humanity to stop anytime that their partner wants them to. So, while this condom may not actually prevent rape; it sends out a message about mutual respect and consent – a message that unfortunately still needs repetition and clarification.
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